The Strengths Studio Blog
Toxic Leadership or A Lack of Shared Accountability?
Everywhere you look, there are posts warning about toxic leadership behaviors. And while truly harmful leadership exists, I’m increasingly concerned that the term is being used so broadly that it’s losing its meaning.
In many workplaces shaped by blurred boundaries, shifting expectations, and increasing complexity, the line between harm and discomfort is often blurred. As a result, leaders are sometimes labeled toxic not for causing damage, but for being direct, holding clear standards, or giving feedback that requires people to stretch and grow.
That framing worries me.
Because it assumes something that often isn’t true: that leaders simply show up toxic.
In my experience, most don’t.
More often, what we’re seeing is the result of unmet expectations, unclear accountability, and conversations that were avoided for too long.
Most Leaders Don’t Start Toxic, They Start Capable
Most leaders begin with strong intent:
- They care about outcomes
- They want people to succeed
- They feel responsible for results
But many have never been taught how to:
- Hold others accountable without carrying all the weight themselves
- Address underperformance early and clearly
- Navigate strengths and style collisions before frustration builds
So when expectations go unmet—repeatedly—something else shows up. Not toxicity. Resentment.
And resentment often grows in the very places where empathy is emphasized, but accountability is not.
The Empathy Imbalance We Don’t Talk About
Empathy is essential in leadership. But empathy without accountability creates a quiet imbalance.
High performers: adjust, compensate, carry more, and lower their expectations or burn out trying to hold it all together.
Meanwhile, chronic underperformance often hides behind circumstances, good intentions, or “effort.”
At some point, leaders are left asking the question no one wants to voice: How many times do we absorb this before it becomes a performance issue?
When that question goes unanswered, frustration leaks out sideways.
And that is what often gets labeled as “toxic.”
When Strengths Collide, Basements Appear
Let’s explore this from a strengths lens. Take a couple of my top strengths, Achiever–Maximizer, which I know many leaders carry as well.
We move fast.
We raise the bar.
We deliver results that can surpass expectations.
In systems without shared accountability:
- Our pace feels like pressure
- Our standards feel unreasonable
- Our directness feels harsh
Not because we lack empathy, but because no one has created clarity around expectations, ownership, or contribution. Under sustained misalignment, even the best strengths slip into the basement.
Toxicity Is Often a Symptom, Not the Cause
What I see frequently called “toxic leadership” is frequently the byproduct of avoided conversations:
- Standards that were never made explicit
- Performance gaps that were tolerated too long
- Accountability that rested on one person instead of the team
- Strengths differences that were never translated
When leaders are left holding results and emotions and excuses, something eventually gives.
A Better Conversation
Instead of labeling people: “Toxic leaders”
What if we asked:
- Where is accountability unclear or uneven?
- What expectations were assumed instead of stated?
- Which strengths are colliding without awareness?
- Who is carrying the cost of underperformance?
That shift doesn’t excuse poor behavior.
It explores it and makes change possible.
The Reframe We Need
Toxic leadership isn’t always about bad people. Often, it’s about good leaders operating in systems that don’t support shared accountability.
When we teach leaders how to:
- Set clear standards
- Share ownership of outcomes
- Address performance early
- Manage their strengths under pressure
We don’t just reduce toxicity.
We prevent it.
As we enter 2026, let’s stop labeling and start leading.
Let’s engage in real conversations where accountability is shared, expectations are clear, and outcomes matter. And let’s give leaders and teams the tools to navigate these conversations with clarity and compassion so that workplaces become stronger, more effective, and more capable of achieving meaningful results. When there is a miss, we shouldn’t rush to place blame or assign a label. We should seek to understand what broke down and move forward together.
